Now that I think about it...

During my first two years in college, I used to take the Amtrak from SD to Fullerton. I would take the city bus, route 101 Solana Beach, to arrive at Oceanside Amtrak train station. Like many people, I really enjoy taking the train. However, I enjoy driving more, which why I no longer take the amtrak. Among other reasons, of course.

If you know me, you know I'm hardly ever on time anywhere. I try to be early, but the snooze button gets the best of me, and so does (and I hate to admit,) facebook. Thank goodness the two could never really go together because I probably wouldn't ever do anything. Unless I was dreaming about trolling on facebook.

Facebook is a whole different story. I wouldn't say I'm 'having fun' on facebook, but usually when I open Safari, I almost always go straight to facebook. Yeah, I feel pathetic now, but at least I'm owning up to it.

.... Surprisingly, that still doesn't make me feel any better.

Anyways,

A very random event happened to me one of the times I went on the Amtrak. I was late and, taking the bus.. I couldn't rush my way to the station. Pulling out my Nintendo DS, I let the bus driver do this thang. When I arrived at the station around 6:31pm, I saw my train leaving. Thankfully Amtrak has a good system where if you miss your train, you can hop onto the next. But what to do during sunset in a neighborhood I am not very much familiar with?

Watching the train crawl by (it doesnt go very fast at first), the guy wearing a backpack and carrying a beat up skateboard turns slightly towards me and says, "Well, there goes our train".

What is a girl to do?

I don't remember what happened after that, but the next thing I know we're crossing the street to a local pizza shop he claims he likes, and we agree that we will wait for the next train together.

He orders a greasy looking pizza, and I don't remember what I got, if I got anything at all.

We talked about lots of things from school to dating history. I don't remember if he was cute or not. But I guess it didn't matter because when we got back to the train station, we couldn't sit together (there were only single seaters available), and I never saw him ever again.

Instead I sat next to a girl who noticed me reading one of the Twilight series (whocares, i like it!) and we talked about Stephanie Meyer and the new book she's coming out with. She was cool but I wanted her to shut up so I can find out about what happened to Edward and Bella.

Toobad I have to shower and go to work now, because I wanted to make this post really long and draggy.

...draggier.

good idea, poor execution

My eyes are heavy and they burn from lack of rest. All this for what, for about 3 or 4 hours of productive studying? Invest 10 hours and you will make use of only 3 hours. I'm in such a better mood when I'm not studying.

Here I have my brushes, I've got a few colors, a blank canvas and a limited amount of time. If you have some free time, stay here with me because I would love to paint you a story:

Prickly, but once we press the weight of our body against the multitude of individual pieces of grass, the uncomfortable feeling transforms into a soft, snuggly bed of fluff. Fluff we see when we open our eyes and see directly above us, the enormous cloudy tapestry that tells stories we love to create. Create with me a cinematic story, or share with me a snippet of your past adventures. Adventuresome I feel, laying here next to you, doing close to absolutely nothing. Nothing else would satisfy me more at this moment than to know that you reciprocate these same emotions. Emotions we try to make sense of when we try to make shapes of the fluff in the sky, playfully insinuating double meanings with our anecdotes that may or may not relate to--

Oh I ran out of colors, and freetime. Toodlelooobabyboo.

Dont bother me, I'm chillin

I don't feel like it, and besides, did I mention I don't feel like it?

Sometimes I prefer being alone. There's nothing wrong with that, except I'll run out of excuses one day. It's not you, it's most definitely me. I like what I am doing currently, and I don't want to disrupt what good groove I have goin on right now.

Silence and freedom. Freedom to do whatever I please, wear whatever I want and rub off the remaining eyeliner left on my face. I want to crawl into my bed with a book, textbook, magazine or even my doodling pad and leave my hair in a messy bun. The windows will be open and the cold breeze will only make me sink deeper into my sheets. The mixture of my music and the sound outside may seem distracting but it only helps me sleep better.

That is, if I feel like sleeping.

I can do whatever I feel like. No need to entertain or be entertained. I am satisfied with what is here in front of me right now.

So why would I want to disrupt what I have going on right now? It's not you, it's me. If it were anyone else I'd still feel the same. A small dosage of solitude goes a long way.

<>

Begin fun

There's a little "It" that I thought I always wanted. Years have passed and "It" has always been a little tease, prancing around just within my reach, but nearly impossible to obtain. But now that I've got it, I don't want It anymore. Previously I idealized this "It" item as something to look forward to, a challenge to overcome, and It would represent a symbolic proof of accomplishment and growth. Maybe it was the thrill of the chase that sparked my interest and initiated my ambitions and assertiveness.

Having a few days to soak in the accomplishment I felt from finally obtaining this particular "It", I later realized that this is not something I want. This isn't the route I want to take. Sure, I knew It would always be temporary-- just something to keep me occupied and stable-- but it isn't what I want. It, as I now anticipate, is no more than a mere disappointment and quite frankly, sucky. Now It has come to me, but I am not satisfied. I see It as equivalent to... soggy bread. Bread it is, but attractive and amazing It is not.

So goodbye It!

IS WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO SAY.

I am over It and I hope someone else takes It, but I do feel slightly obligated to be with It now.

Optimistic? Let's be realistic.

Despite what I say at interviews, I am not good at managing my time.

Iron Man Midnigh

Not recommended for children, pregnant or nursing women, or those sensitive to caffeine.

Before I head back out the door, I would like to share that I am IN LOVE with this right now. Without this magic fuel, I would be defunct. Horizontal stripes are NOT a girl's best friend. However, placing an image in the foreground boosts self esteem. Don't let your eyes fool you.

Cute guy at the school shuttle stop who looks like an half asian-white Ryan Reynolds, you are always the highlight of my Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Jiminy Cricket, my curtains are ky00t.